I'd Rather Stab Pins In My Eyeballs!

So, the question I've been asked is, "How is Farrell's going?"  

For those of you who don't already know, Farrell's (FXB from now on) is my 10 week exercise program that is sheer TORTURE!!

Here we are at the end of week 2, and I am desperately trying to see some results....is my butt still as dimpled?  Are my arms still flabby?  Do I still have boobs on my back?  

And the answer is - YES to all!!   No measurable progress at all!  WHAT IS THE POINT?????

Here is a summary of the events of the last 2 weeks:

Fitness Testing Day nearly killed me.  "Before" photos taken in a bikini, sit ups and push ups were counted, and the dreaded one mile run was timed.  Weight and body fat percentage were recorded as well.  My stats are as follows (and I am ONLY posting these numbers so that at the end of this hellish journey hopefully you will all be witness to the incredible progress I have made):   Weight:  175.5     Body Fat:  39%      Sit ups/min: ???  I think the number was around 12, but Laura and I got the giggles pretty bad, and you cannot do sit ups while laughing uncontrollably.    Push ups/min: 15    Again, this number is questionable.  I got down to the ground many  times and collapsed.  Although I got back up eventually, I don't think I did but 2 or 3 real push ups.   Mile time:  11.5 min

Armed with these tragic results, we began the journey that will last for the next 10 weeks.  Mon, Wed, Fri is cardio kickboxing.  If you have not yet tried this, I highly suggest that you avoid it like the plague!  It is hard, it makes me sweat like never before and it makes my face turn a deep reddish purple color that does not go away for hours.  Highly embarrassing! (This was also the cause for our case of the giggles during the sit up test which came AFTER the mile run on testing day.)

Tues, Thurs, and Sat are resistance bands.  I see these days as a break.  While it is still very hard, and definately responsible for most of my soreness, at least my face remains a normal color and there is very little sweating going on.  We rotate between upper and lower body on these days.  Legs KILL!!  Arms KILL!!  I was unable to lift my arms above my head or walk up the stairs without whimpering - and still am for that matter.  When does all this get easier?

Then there is the diet plan.  6 small meals a day, with equal parts of protein and carbs at each meal and all the veggies you can eat.  No sugar or artificial sweetener (hence my breakup with Sonic) and 100 oz. of water every day.  I feel like I'm drowning.  Water makes me gag - literally.  I hate it.  And just as I get a bottle down, it's time for another one.  UGH!

So my coaches assure me that it's normal not to lose weight right away.  There are several factors that lead to this.  ONE - I have gone from NEVER exercising to hard exercising 6 days a week.  My body is in shock and it will take a while for it to get with the program.  TWO - I have gone from drinking NO water at all to 100 oz. a day.  I am retaining it until my body learns to flush it out.  THREE - after a lifetime of unhealthy eating habits, my body thinks I'm trying to starve it and is storing every bit of food I put in it for fear that it won't get enough.  After a couple of weeks this too will change.  They have told me not to weigh myself every day (but I can't help it!  I'm looking for any small drop that may come!) and that by the 5 week weigh in I will see significant changes.  It takes time to adjust to all this at once.  Plus, muscle weighs more than fat, BLAH, BLAH BLAH!

Here is my plan.  If at 5 weeks I don't see changes that make me happy, like baggier pants, smaller numbers or smaller body parts, I will QUIT!!  This is waaaaaaaaay too hard to do just for fun.  When I was on Weight Watchers, I lost nearly 8 lbs in the first 2 weeks, and I wasn't exercising at all.  So the plan would then be to get back on Weight Watchers and walk every night.  Easier, cheaper, and probably better results. 

In conclusion, I think my body is rejecting this kind of severe program, and I am more than a little upset at the lack of results.  I hope that I have the power to stick to it until the end, but I'm not making any promises.  I just want to be skinny for our cruise in September - and I hope I find a way to accomplish that goal!